... There is a newborn in the house?
* Mum, I don't like that sound very much.
* You can single handedly: turn on the kettle, make a bowl of cornflakes and navigate the morning while breast feeding
* It still hurts to sit.
* It takes speed, endurance and sharp wit.. to put a singlet on a near 5kg wriggling screaming mess.
* You eat like a teenage boy.
* Leaving the house before 2pm requires more organisation than I posses.
* You considered spaghetti on toast for tea, adults included.
* The same ad drives you bonkers on telly. Trivargo, I am looking at you.
* You start finding creative ways to stay awake at 2am feeds. Candy crush, you hurt my feelings.
* You can grocery shop like a Ninja.
* Wondersuits were made purely to make grumpy babies look immensely cuter.
* That slow motion nooooooooooo as your 5 year old announces she is going to play with her sleeping little sister.
* You swaddle, like your morning coffee depends on it.
* You have never had so many conversations about poo in your life.
* You're more disappointed that you have to take your warm dressing gown off.. than the fact that there is poo on it.
* Your local Mcdonalds is in fact, open 24 hours and your husband can indeed get a few hours shut-eye with grizzly-chops in a tiny corolla. He won the bonus points that day.
* You handover the rights to your boobs to a 2 week old.
* Nap time = DO ALL THE THINGS!
* You sleep on your tummy and almost weep with joy.
* Metamucil, because no new mum needs to strain.
* Wiping crumbs off your child's head. Sorry, it's mums lunchtime too.
* Online shopping suddenly just got a whole lot more desirable.
* You car is 98% child paraphernalia. And biscuit crumbs.
* Holding conversations about Minecraft, kinder surprises and why trees are called trees.. on no sleep.
* The love, you just didn't even know you possessed. From tiny little eyelashes to roly-poly little arms. You embrace it fully, knowing now that these moments are all too fleeting. They grow so fast. Your love for your 5 year old, explodes. They suddenly are so grown up. You embrace them longer, harder and let them be little.. a while longer.